maybe three days old
Look at that face. I mean look at it! It looks like one of those 3D sonogram pictures. Like he's just a glowy little fetus lying there on the bed between us. That whole "fourth trimester" thing, totally true. He was just this itty bitty helpless goob. I LOVED having him sleep in our bed. We had a cosleeper next to the bed, but for those first few months, he mostly just slept on one of us.
Cut to last night, when a still very cute, but not so itty bitty toddler came into our room crying TWICE before midnight. I relented because I'm weak, and let him sleep in our bed, where if I'm honest he ends up every night. Only now he's a bundle of wiry muscles, all elbows and knees, oh and for some reason he shouts things like "NO Mama, I don't want to look at the spiders!" and "No! Get him" and "No Daddy, I don't want to go!" That's right baby, stuff it down and only let it out and night.
We keep saying we're going to sleep train again. We're gonna put our foot down. One of us is going to lay down the law. Yeah right. There's never a good time, and it just seems easier to let him sleep with us when he stumbles in a 2am. The thought of getting out of our warm bed, making him cry, having to use reason, and logic, and you know, be a parent at that hour is too much. He also likes to sleep sideways between us, with his head burrowed over my pillow and his feet just in kicking range of Nipper's face. Delightful! There's also the new "fake crying" sound, sort of a "gloop" sound deep in his throat that makes him cough after he's done it 4 or 5 times. He's decided he needs to practice this sounds at regular intervals between 3 and 5 a.m., which makes for all of us being bleary eyed and cranky most mornings lately.
I know when he grows up I'll miss us all piling in the bed, and I'll have forgotten all about the late night head butts and crazy shouting, but I'd give my pinky toe for a good night of sleep for all of us right now. Just one night where by some miracle, all three of us slept through the night until 7am. How did that become a dream come true? I've really lowered the bar on expectations.
I've got to go now, because Jack's in the toy room pooping, and I have to go bargain with him to LET me change his diaper. I'm going to teach him to say "This one's a doozy!" when he's done.