Sunday, January 16, 2011

this foot was made for walking

Stage make-up is stupid. 

You all know by now that I don't have a clue. It's like I have life ADD. I routinely undertake projects that are way over my head. Get pregnant and have a kid? Sure. Shoot a tv pilot with a new camera? No problem! R2D2 cake? I'm your girl. 

One time in college, I needed 3 credits to keep on schedule for graduation. I was doing the play Iphigenia at Aulis at the school theater. I told the Director that I had EXTENSIVE make-up experience, and had done make-up when I performed The Nutcracker with the Pittsburgh Ballet. Never mind I was 11 years old, tops, and I'm pretty sure all I was allowed to wear was some blush from the grocery store that came with it's own brush. "Maybe she's born with it!". 

I "researched" period make-up, bought stage make-up from Ben Nye, which if you've never used, is something straight from HELL, and showed all the actors what their faces should looks like. Spoiler alert: Agamemnon sacrifices their daughter Iphegenia so that the soldiers can go kill people, Clytemnestra her mother loses her shit. Everyone looked SUPER Greek. Actually I'm pretty sure everyone looked like they had 10lbs of Ben Nye grease paint in a vague Cleopatra theme. The theater was about as big as my living room, so I'm sure the effect was profound. I got my 3 credits. So I didn't go to Harvard (shut-up Nipper Knapp)

THIS is a walking foot and it's SCARY!

So I'm following this pattern to make the sea view quilt, and I get to the quilting part, and realize I don't have a "walking foot", whatever that is. I call around a few sewing places here in town. No one has one. Finally some ancient lady at International Silks and Woolens tells me, I have to go to the Pasadena Sewing and Vacuum Center. They have everything. She's right. They have the foot I need. 

However, the guy who showed me how to put it on my machine was from Norfolk Virginia, the fact that I was in the store 7 minutes, and know that, should tell you everything you need to know. His demonstration, was folksy and brief. There was something about unscrewing my chassis, or nut, or something, and latching the prong. I've had it for 2 days, and haven't had the courage to try to put it on the machine yet. When I asked if they had one that just clips on, like the other feet I have, he just laughed at me, like I had asked for a 3 legged table. "Well there's no such thing little lady!" Ok, so he didn't say "little lady" but it was implied. 

80 degree January beach day. I HEART LA!

Today, rather than clean my office, attach that foot, quilt my quilt, answer emails, or do anything productive at all, Jack and I went to the beach. I got lots of wet sandy hugs, and I love you momma's in between fighting the waves, shouting at my baby belly like a drill sargeant "YOU COME OUT HERE RIGHT NOW BABY BROTHER AND PLAY WITH ME!", and snacks where Jack kept saying "good friends" and then insisting I say "good food" in a scooby doo voice. Perfect underachiever Sunday. 

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