Does this ever happen to you?

Look at my mom trying to edify me... in ITALY, and look at how I'm not listening...

I was checking my email, minding my own business yesterday when I got this email from my mother with the subject line: Adult ADHD, the contents of the email included a link to this article, and nothing more. 

I'm sure my mother's not the only one who does this. I'm sure once Jack is old enough to not live with me or has his own email address (next summer), I'll be doing the same to him. Before she worked out how to solve all of my ills via the interwebs, she did it through the good old U.S. postal service. One time she even told my brother that he should go get a job AT the U.S. postal service as a panacea to what ailed him. (I'm pretty sure what ailed him was being 25 with a bachelors degree in philosophy) She would send books: "What Color Is Your Parachute?", "Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers", "The NEW our Bodies Ourselves", "Ask Dr. Weil", "The Artists Way". The list goes on, and on, and on. She also sent articles. As in news clippings. Cartoons, real estate news about my area, real estate news about places she thought I'd like to be my area, op-eds, book reviews, health studies, pamphlets, and sometimes funny obituaries with notes scribbled on the sides like "I want a funny obituary like this". My favorite was the time she sent me a full page ad from the back of the New York Times with a note saying "Is this you?". It wasn't. 

She also sent me vitamins. As if from 1000 miles away she could diagnose what my body was deficient in, with nothing more than a mother's good sense. I think I had a conversation with her once where she told me over the phone I wasn't getting enough calcium. When I asked her how she knew, she said "I'm your mother." I had two giant drawers in my first apartment FILLED with dietary supplements. So yay internet. My mother is single handedly saving old growth forests by pointing and clicking me to good health. 

The article she sent was sort of interesting. I don't always get to read the things she sends (sorry mom) because I'm busy, or they don't seem like anything that pertains to me. But the title made me laugh, and I have been wondering about the volume of undertakings on my list lately. As in, I've been laying awake at two in the morning writing blog posts in my head, and re-arranging Jack's bedroom furniture. So I read it. But half way through I realized I was late for an audition, and that I needed to feed Jack, and the phone was ringing, and Nipper was asking me a question, and if I could just sew the last side of the curtain for his new room, he could sleep in there tonight, oh and I was on fire... So I never finished it. If you do, let me know how it turns out. And if I need to see a doctor immediately.