Monday, October 26, 2009

who knew chores could be SO sexy?

SO, I'm pretty sure I accomplished more this weekend than I have in the last 3 months combined. You know that feeling when you have too much you have to do, and too much you want to do, and not enough time to do either. So I've been feeling like that pretty much non stop since about 30 seconds after Jack was born. But this weekend, I broke the spell! Somehow I managed to do a bunch of stuff and spend time with Jack. It was one of those magic times when no one throws a fit, no keys get lost, no one gets a last minute audition in santa monica at 5:30. Magic.

Nipper agreed that if I got up with Jack at whatever ridiculous hour he decided to grace us with his presence on Saturday, he'd get up at 8:30, so I could go to the sample sale, baby free. Love that Nipper Knapp. Ok, so I meet Sadie there, and we're excited because there are only a handful of ladies milling about on the sidewalk. When they open the door we are somewhat disappointed to see that it's a pretty small space, but worse, that we're all going to be let in at the same time. I don't have to tell you what happens next. It's ugly. Women are crouched around boxes of ella moss and splendid littles, elbowing, scowling, grunting strange things. I quickly ascertain that there's not much there for me in the way of cute boy stuff (always the way) and I decide that digging through a box on the floor like and animal for a half priced jersey top isn't how I want to start my day. Don't get me wrong, if I thought there was some crewcuts stuff in there, I'd have been knocking ladies out.

Ok, so as I'm one of the only women standing upright, I notice on a side table this little stack of alphabet cards. I quickly realize they are the Ida Pearle cards that I had been coveting when they had them on the site a few months back. Hooray! Hooray! A little treasure. I highly recommend checking out her stuff, it's beautiful.

Ok, so we were out of there in under 15 minutes, so we went to Lowe's to check out tile for the kitchen. Sadie is a super shopper. By super I don't mean she's great. I mean she's freakin superior. She's better at it than you. Fact. But I had no idea she had crazy home improvement skills. If Nipper and I go into these places it's endless decisions that we can't seem to make. Sadie and I got an employee to go get us a cart, load four boxes of tile, pick out the adhesive, find the grout color we wanted (I decided on dove grey), without really asking or saying please. We were out of there in 20 minutes. This was at Lowe's you understand. Not Saks, not Barneys, LOWE'S. We asked if he had any more of the tile on the shelf, and he went and did all this for us. Did I mention Sadie is a model? I'm thinking of taking her to dentist to see if there's some magic pain free service you get there if you're pretty...

Ok, so tile purchased, we went to Ikea. I just needed to get a frame for this photo that I had printed a few years ago, and had lost to the garage until we started cleaning it out to convert it to our office. While we were there, I found tea towels to make Sadie some owl towels like the ones at Anthropologie that we refuse to pay $18 for. I got a perfect frame. I found a mirror for the STILL unfinished downstairs bathroom. Picked a bookshelf for Jack's room, and ate my first Ikea cinnamon roll. Uhm, yes to that!

SO I came home, and took a nap with Jack. We've fallen into a bad habit of keeping our windows closed even in perfect weather and relying on the a/c. Nipper had opened all the windows, and so while Jack napped in our bed, I laid next to him reading a book, watching the curtains blow in the breeze. You know, LA, 70, sunny, perfect.

When Jack got up, I went outside to finally plant those ferns I bought after seeing the ones Kelly had on her porch in Nashville. (Sunday I got Nipper to drill holes in the window sill and hang those ferns WHILE football was on the tv. I think I had momentary super powers this weekend.) I planted two mandevillas that I've had for oh I don't know 5 months. I framed the photograph, paid some bills, made Jack dinner, put him to bed, and watched The Abyss.

And that was just Saturday!

On Sunday I did a headshot for one of my clients who I shot when she was a kid. I'm not really doing headshots anymore as it's just too hard to work them into our cuckoo baby, audition, eating, sleeping, Madmen watching schedule. But I always say yes to old clients. So I did that, went to Target for diapers and wipes and ended up with $30 in plastic christmas plates and cups for Jack, which I knew Nipper would hate. But this morning Jack had his cocoa out of a snowman sippy cup. How festive is that?

Then I went and had a massage at Burke Williams, where my masseuse who sort of resembled that gymnast guy in Oceans 11 (or 12 or 13) but with a GIANT black mole on his face, rubbed my neck until my shoulders were no longer up by my ears. He also did some kind of crazy thai stretching that made my hips feel like Gumby.

Ok, so I know I'm going to blow you're mind right now, but after all of that, we went for Sushi. No, seriously, we left the house after 6pm, and ate in a restaurant. It was kind of surreal. I had two fusions, which is a pink drink they make with soju, and then I lost my ability to concentrate on the conversation which was mostly about the hostess who was about to lose her top and kept hiking it up as she travelled from the front door to nearby tables. Classy. Ladies, if you're going to wear a strapless dress, please tape it to your body with some Hollywood Stick Tape. Because no matter how pretty you think your decolletage is, it's not when you're tugging on your dress all night like a cholo holding up his low rider dickies. NOT PRETTY.

Ok, so this morning, we cleared almost everything out of the garage in final preparations for Nipper's Dad's arrival. He's going to help Nipper drywall. This put me in a spectacular mood because I had checked something else off my to do list. I'm practically in mommy nirvana as I'm sweeping up the floor. Nipper Knapp on the other hand was cranky and now seems to be questioning his own mortality. Oh did I mention that when Roberto showed up to start the tile we discovered that there was no hardybacker behind the old tile. Uhm, yeah, they had to take it down to the studs, which sent Nipper Knapp into a tailspin of remorse and loathing. I think he's at Sharkey's right now trying to tie one on.

By the end of this week, I will have more things checked off my to-do list than I thought was possible this year. I might even muster the strength to finish the downstairs bathroom. It could totally fucking happen.

1 comment:

  1. Okay, may your Mom just say, if you had a basement with a washer and dryer and a huge dining room table down there-out of site-the clean laundry pile-might be your pile management system too. Probably not since as I recall, you were organizing my check register by the time you were 9. Then you learned to balance my check book at 10.
    Passing on to now-what the heck happened to the kitchen? Reminds me of the time your dad and I decided to put in a new bathroom and new drywall in the kitchen between Thanksgiving and Christmas-Christmas eve we were looking for a shower curtain rod and a toilet seat. Happy tiling-can't wait to see it.