patent #965,456,782,349,784,219,888,537

This hippo doesn't have anything to do with anything. I took her picture at the LA Zoo last year. 

I dunno how many patents there are. That was just a guess.


Here are two things I would like someone to invent. 


Some kind of pop-up lap cradle for airplane travel. It would have to be small enough to fit in a diaper bag, but then unfold quickly (pop-up) to cover your lap, while keeping the baby off your actual lap so your ass doesn't fall asleep on the plane, and you can't move because if that baby wakes up and cries so help you god you and everyone around you is going to FREAK OUT. Someone get on that. Might I suggest using some space age fabrics and mechanisms? Great. 


The second thing I think would be great is some way to wash your armpits when you are just out in the world. Not like a portable sink and soapy washcloth, but something more like the flowbee, but for armpit cleaning. I dunno how it would work. But it would have to be quick, quiet, and (obv) discreet. You don't want to be all "excuse me folks, I'm just going to go use the ladies room, if you hear a jet engine sound coming from that direction, it's NOT my portable armpit washer. Not at all." All I'm saying is there are times when I would like to just duck into a bathroom and take a mini shower. 


So how's YOUR week going?