Sleep Schmeep

maybe three days old

Look at that face. I mean look at it! It looks like one of those 3D sonogram pictures. Like he's just a glowy little fetus lying there on the bed between us. That whole "fourth trimester" thing, totally true. He was just this itty bitty helpless goob. I LOVED having him sleep in our bed. We had a cosleeper next to the bed, but for those first few months, he mostly just slept on one of us. 

Cut to last night, when a still very cute, but not so itty bitty toddler came into our room crying TWICE before midnight. I relented because I'm weak, and let him sleep in our bed, where if I'm honest he ends up every night. Only now he's a bundle of wiry muscles, all elbows and knees, oh and for some reason he shouts things like "NO Mama, I don't want to look at the spiders!" and "No! Get him" and "No Daddy, I don't want to go!" That's right baby, stuff it down and only let it out and night. 

We keep saying we're going to sleep train again. We're gonna put our foot down. One of us is going to lay down the law. Yeah right. There's never a good time, and it just seems easier to let him sleep with us when he stumbles in a 2am. The thought of getting out of our warm bed, making him cry, having to use reason, and logic, and you know, be a parent at that hour is too much. He also likes to sleep sideways between us, with his head burrowed over my pillow and his feet just in kicking range of Nipper's face. Delightful! There's also the new "fake crying" sound, sort of a "gloop" sound deep in his throat that makes him cough after he's done it 4 or 5 times. He's decided he needs to practice this sounds at regular intervals between 3 and 5 a.m., which makes for all of us being bleary eyed and cranky most mornings lately. 

I know when he grows up I'll miss us all piling in the bed, and I'll have forgotten all about the late night head butts and crazy shouting, but I'd give my pinky toe for a good night of sleep for all of us right now. Just one night where by some miracle, all three of us slept through the night until 7am. How did that become a dream come true? I've really lowered the bar on expectations. 

I've got to go now, because Jack's in the toy room pooping, and I have to go bargain with him to LET me change his diaper. I'm going to teach him to say "This one's a doozy!" when he's done. 

Free birth control, fertilizer, and other mind blowing perks!

So this week I got to thinking about a few of my babyless friends who have asked me in the last two years, "How is it? Is it hard? Do you love it?"  Here are a few tidbits to elucidate the joys of parenthood.

For the most part, it's the most overwhelming feeling of love, and pride, and ooey gooey all encompassing smoochiness. Most days, I have to restrain myself from trying to eat Jack's face. I'm not a cannibal, but now I see how it could happen. Just one little cheek. But there is a dark side. 

Three days ago, Jack went up to his friend Cleo's house to play. It was the first time that Nipper Knapp and I have been alone together in the house in TWO YEARS!!!! So take a look at your husband, or boyfriend, or wife, or girlfriend or Oprah, or whoever it is you're thinking of have a baby with, and know that it might be a LONG time before you are able to, you know, sit on the couch naked in the middle of the afternoon and eat cheesy poofs. Or whatever it is that got you thinking about baby making in the first place... 

Tuesday night was also special and romantic because Jack pooped on our bedroom floor, stepped in it, and crawled into our bed, spreading his poopy goodness far and wide. I'm just sayin...

The above pictures were taken in his bath 7 minutes before the poop on the floor incident (his first, and I'm hoping last). SO as you can see, it's complicated.